Forks and Spoons: Chapter Nine.

"I'm just saying man, if we were gay I would definately be the pitcher." Donner said with a smirk.
"I don't know why the fuck we're having this conversation and how it even started" said Kim.
"Well, you said you think there's a chance that Midnight might be secretly gay and hiding it from the rest of us, and I said that it makes sense. And then you said...."
"Listen, I don't really care, Donner. Sorry, but I need to study this script."
"It's all good man." Donner turned to me. "You've been quiet this whole time man, what's up?"
"That girl, Mandy. She's incredibly cute in a weird way."
Kim stood up and paused and said,"Believe me, you don't want that" before he left the room. Donner and I just sat in silence for a while. Then we heard SK scream from the other room. I ran over there and saw him with his hands on the side of his head staring at a package of peach rings. "Um, what's wrong SK?"
"Do you know how many fucking Peach rings there are left?!"
I counted them, "Uh..looks like twenty three?"
"FUCK!!!! Blows my mind!"
"Oh is that a reference to that movie?" I said with a chuckle. At that moment SK got really close to my face and whispered, "It's real. 23's real.....asshole" and then went back to being his cheery self. SK sat down and started munching down on his peach rings. The phone rang. SK looked up at me, "Well? You gonna answer that?"
I walked over to the phone and picked it up. "Hello?"
"Who's this?"
"Eric, Eric Aldrin"
"Ok, well Eric can you tell SK that I'm one up on his ass. He needs to get on MY level. I just hooked up with this really hot Sang ger. And tell him that for me."
"Um alright, what was that again? A Sang ger? Um...how do you spell that?"
"Motherfucker. S-i-n-g-e-r"
"Ohhhhh singer!"
"That's what I said."
"Yeah sorry" He'd already hung up. "Hey SK! Shit....I forgot to ask who called but they said that they were one up on you and that you need to get on his level because he hooked up with a really hot singer."
"Wait, wait, wait. Did he say singer? Or did her Sang ger?"
"Sang ger"
"Ah shit son! That was Antone! That motherfucker! Shit, I gotta leave then. Take care of Mandy when she wakes up, Deuces Eric!" He said as he ran out of the room. Then, he ran back in, "Shit! My peach rings!" he picked them up and ran back out.
I decided to walk over to the kitchen and get a beer. I sat there sipping on it when Mandy walked in. She was wearing a button-up shirt and her legs were bare. I just decided to keep on sipping my beer. "So uh, you're Eric right?"
"Yeah, that's me"
"I'm Mandy."
"I know"
"Well....this is an awkward conversation" My phone vibrated.
"Hold on lemme check this."
"Ok. I'll be standing right here." I looked at my phone. It was from Donner, "Yo dude, are you gonna fuck her or wat?????" I closed my phone. "So Mandy, where are you from?"
"I'm from around here."
"Oh that's cool..."
"Hey, do you know where I can get some reefer?"
"Uh...I have no idea."
"Alright, well i'll see you later Eric."
She left. "Bye." I cursed at myself. I fucked up. Kim walked in. "So you fucked up man."
"I know."
"I told you, you don't want none of that."
"She's so gorgeous though. Even though she's..."
"Addicted to ganja? I know."
"But, I don't care. I think I want to ask her out."
"You ask her out Eric, and it's your fucking ass."

Forks and Spoons: Chapter Eight.

I woke up with a hangover. I looked around me and didn't know where the hell I was. But, I have to admit that the room I was in was the most beautiful room I'd ever seen. The curtains were drawn just enough that the sunlight barely peeked through. The bed that I laid on was like lying on a cloud. I looked around and saw three doors, one right by the corner, another in the middle of the wall to the previous door's left, and the last directly ahead of me. I opened the one ahead of me, it was a closet filled with about thirty suits all in dry cleaning bags. I decided to put one on, the italian silk felt cool to the touch and the suit was really able to breathe. I opened the door in the corner and saw a hallway. Then, out of curiosity I decided to open the last door. It was a bathroom. No, scratch that. It was a King's bathroom. The toilet looked like a fine porcelain throne. To my left was two sinks with golden faucets. In the shower, was a singing six foot black man. I immediately closed the door, and went out into the hallway. When I got to the stairs I recognized where I was. I was in Antone's house! SK happened to be walking by at that point and spotted me. "Yo! Where the fuck were you?! You're as hard for me to find as it is for Baldy to find the g-spot on a woman!" He let out a ridiculous laugh. "I was in the most beautiful room i've ever seen."
"Oh, did it have a bed as soft as a cloud?"
"As a matter of fact, it did" He hit me in the back of the head.
"You idiot! That's Antone's room! NO ONE goes in there!"
"Alright, alright. But, in my defense I don't know how I got there. And i'm a little scared because there's a black guy in the shower."
"Oh shit! Is Antone home?! Did he see you in his bed?!"
"Hey! SK! That doesn't matter right now! I'm really scared that I had gay sex with a six foot black guy!"
"Wait, wait. Did you say six foot?"
"Yeah....why?"
"Oh thank god, it's just Midnight."

"That's the great Cazad to you, SK" I turned around to see a toned black guy wearing nothing but a towel.
"Great Cazad? What are you, a fucking genie?" SK said with a smirk.
"You know what? Crack jokes, but I went home with this really cute girl last night." SK turned to me. He whispered, "Midnight, or Cazad or whatever the fuck he wants his name to be happens to like....what's the word....bigger girls. He's kind of the guy that feeds the black sterotype. But, on the plus side, they ALWAYS have money. So basically, we'll see him for a while and kick it a lot. Until he get's a new 'Sugah Momma' then he'll disappear for a couple weeks and then come back." Just then, the doorbell rang. Midnight ran down the stairs to get the door and in the process lost his towel. He opened the door and there stood a girl who looked.....well.....super fucked up.
"Hey, can you tell me where I am?" she said.
"You're at my friend's doorstep."
"Yeah but, where.....are you naked?" Midnight looked down and realized he was.
"Well, yes I am. I have three questions for you: Do you like black guys, How long is your hair, and can you cook?" Out of nowhere Donner hit Midnight and knocked him out. He chuckled. "I've always wanted to do that. When we wakes up just tell him that he's hypoglycemic or something." SK laughed, "Alright Donner, we will."
"Alright man, I'll catch you guys later. I'ma go kick it with this cute chick down at Starsmucks." He ran out the door. SK yelled out the door, "It's starFUCKS you fuckin asshole!" The girl standing there seemed very unphased by all of this. "Listen, do you guys have something I can drink? I got cottonmouth bad" she said. SK let her in and I followed them to the kitchen, and we left Midnight just lying there on the ground. But upon second thought I decided to grab his towel and cover his junk. It is common courtesy after all. I went to the kitchen where the girl was drinking a coke and SK was sitting next to her. He turned to me and mouthed, "She fuckin reeks!" Just then, Kim walked in.
"Oh wow. It's you. Guys, this is Mandy" he said with an awkward smile on his face.

Feeling down like a clown. Pagliacci style.

So yeah. Been pretty depressed lately. Not getting any call backs and doesn't look like there's any hope in getting a job. But I have no choice to keep trying. I'm probably going to be working my way through school too. I need some cheering up so hopefully I can get out of the house tonight and maybe see that girl that I have a crush on. That will probably cheer me up some. Well I just realized I have nothing really to talk about so this was kind of a waste of a blog, but oh well. I'll catch you all on the flipside.


-Kimjemin.

I'm a piece of poop.

I said i'd blog everyday but I don't. But i suppose it's all good anyway. Especially if i'm on blogger AND myspace. I know how annoying it is to always have that "New Blog Post" update on myspace. But anyhoo....so let's see...where to start. Well yesterday my sister implored me to go to her high school football game. I went. One thing made me laugh. I apparently pissed a couple people off when I looked at the scoreboard and then told my sister that her schools team sucked. Got a lot of glares and a couple kicks. But you have to understand my point of view. I come from a school that's famous for losing a lot of our games. But, we always have at least above 20 points on the board. Her school won 14 to 12. That's kind of low and not anything to be proud of in my opinion. That means the school made two touchdowns. Whoop-dee-doo. At least, i think it was 14 to 12. I could be wrong. Well after the game we went to Denny's with a couple of my sister's friends. There was this one dude that just talked too much for my tastes. I liked everyone else but this dude.....man. At one point he told a story about how one of his buddies smoked "a couple grams outside his house". Now, I want everyone to know something.
1) Drugs aren't anything to be proud of or at the very least to try bragging about.
2) If you're going to brag about it, at least get your facts straight. Out of every pothead I know, there is none that can smoke "a couple of grams" and still be going. In fact, it took seven guys to polish off an eighth, all potheads. Now for those of you that don't know what an eighth is, it's about 7 grams. So needless to say, this guy tellin this story kind of made me a little ticked. But on the other hand, at least I know that my sister won't get involved with drugs when she's hangin around people who know nothing about them.

Well after that, I went and hung out with my drinkin buddies. (I call them that because I'm pretty sure that's the only activity we do together.) And I was really excited to see them. Then I realized it wasn't excitement. It was a feeling that I haven't felt in a long time....wait, pause. I have to add, not all of my drinkin buddies are men. Ok, play. I felt a feeling I haven't felt in a long time, I have a crush. It feels very strange to have a crush again. In fact, just writing this makes my heart skip a beat. But this girl, she'd been in a couple of my classes I believe, never really talked to her. But once she started hangin out with us recently I realize how incredibly cool she is. But, here's the kicker. She's got a boyfriend and they're very happy together. So i'm gonna have to get over my little crush. I'm just happy that i've felt this feeling again. It's been so long and i'd forgotten what it felt like. Well anyway i'm off for now, here's your joke. I know you've been waiting all this time for one.


By the way if you get mad easily you probably shouldn't read the joke.







So this kid was graduating high school, his dad was very proud of him. His dad said to his son, "Son, i'm very rich and I want you to have whatever you want in this world so tell me, what is it that you'd like to have for your graduation?" His son replied, "I'd like 1000 green golf balls" The father, being loving and accepting didn't ask any questions despite the strange request. But he ignored it and gave it to his son. A few years later is son graduated from medical school and his father offered him the same deal. Again he request 1000 green golf balls. His dad ignored it despite being a bit ticked off at the fact that his son was getting these useless items. A year later, his son got accepted to work at the top hospital in the nation. So he offered the deal again. And once again, his son asked for the green golf balls. This was the final straw, the father stopped talking to the son for many years until one day he receive a phone call. His son had been in a car accident and was now on his deathbed. The father went to the son and told him he loved him but he had to know why he'd always requested those green golf balls. And his son replied, "Well dad I....." and then he died.






Hope you liked it.


:D

-Kimjemin.

I realize

that I did not blog yesterday. Get off my case :D Yesterday I realized that I wanted to get back into this game I used to play and so I did and it got a little out of hand.......ok ok a LOT out of hand. But when you mix korean genes with korean games......wowza. You get about 8 hours of straight gaming. It's in my blood i'm sorry to say. But anyhoo to update everyone on the work out situation here it goes. Yesterday Jared called me up to go do the p90x. We went to his house and did about 10 minutes of it and then decided to get pizza. Now I know you want to judge me but we did seriously talk about how bad it felt to do that. And we both decided that we were just going to do the cardio workouts and ab workouts from the p90x and do the other stuff on our own. For example: there's a video called Chest and back. For that day instead of doing the p90x workout we'd do chest and back the way we used to do it when we had gym memberships. Now after about a month of this, THEN we'll start the p90x. Cause let me tell you....that shit is hard! Let's see....um today I kept on gaming and found out there's this new thing on the game that looks really badass so I got really excited and decided to do it. And that's about it. Oh! got really excited for How I met Your Mother's return yesterday. As some of you may know, that is my favorite show. Second is Scrubs. So needless to say I felt euphoric while watching it and felt a bit of nirvana as well. The feeling, not the band. :D


Alright and here's your joke. It's a one liner.










One of my grandfathers died when he was a child.

Good day.

Well i'm going to make this short cause i'm kind of tired. But today started off bad because I didn't want to wake up for church. But then I went and everyone was talking about how much they missed me and I feel bad for not going now. And then I got back and the Chargers lost. Must say that ruined the day quite a bit. Then later on, I watched the Emmy's. The Emmy's cheered me up a lot because it was really funny, and NPH was hosting. If you're asking how it was funny i'll give you an example. There was an award for best original musical score. And the one that won was the one that Hugh Jackman sang at the Oscars. And while the writers were walking up there, the voice for the Emmy's was saying, la di da they have so many nominations blah blah, and then, "Also, this is the only musical number ever written for a Wolverine." I laughed so hard. And then there was also the one for when Jon Stewart won. "The Jon Stewart program has been on for 76 years and this is Jon Stewart's 900th emmy" Ah, great. But the BEST part was when Dr. Horrible (that's right, Dr. Horrible) hacked into the emmy's! It was awesome! Got a brief glimpse of the wonderful Felicia Day. So cute! Anyway I shall watch an episode of Spin City and go to sleep. I start the p90x again, my return from being sick and not working out, tomorrow so wish me luck!





What do you do when a blonde throws a pin at you?









Run, she's got a grenade in her mouth.











-Kimjemin.

Job Applications....

they wear me out man. They're so long and arduous and end up making you a bit confused sometimes. I don't know if i'm eligible for some of these things. Or even if I should be. And another thing, what is up with those questions? You know the ones i'm talking about. The ones where you have to reply with Strongly Agree, Agree, Strongly Disagree, or Disagree. No offense to companies but that's kind of bull. Because i've noticed what they'll do is they'll sneak the same question back in there to see if you changed your answer. Which actually I suppose is a good way to weed out some people but on the other hand people could be just trying to get through those whole twelve pages and just simply read it wrong and put a different answer. Sorry, if you can't tell these things are driving me crazy lol. By the way that's the first time, I believe that i've used lol in one of my blogs. I tend to try to shy away from it. But anyway today's blog shall not be long, I am exhausted once again so here is your joke.

What's brown and sticky?













A stick.




Get it? Good. Love ya, keep reading.



-Kimjemin.

Dane Cook twitters a lot.

In fact, I believe my phone has vibrated at least 20 times within the past five minutes. But, what are you going to do? It's Dane Cook. It's ok because of that fact lol. But anyway today was pretty uneventful until about 6:30 when my buddy Jay texted me and told me to go to my buddy Adrian's. I went and proceeded to wait for thirty minutes for anyone to get there. But while waiting I made two origami turtles....so that was cool....I guess. Although, I probably would've preferred to skip the origami and just hang out but when your friends have no notion of time what's a guy to do? I watched a film called French Kiss today which was pretty good. It's about this girl who has a fear of planes but when her fiance leaves her for a chick in France she decides to fly there and on the flight meets a jewel thief who hides a necklace in her baggage. It's a romance comedy. It was.....cute. But anyway i'm pretty tired and it's pretty late for me to be awake. Well, for my new bed time anyway lol. So alas today will be a short blog and that will be it. I leave you with a politically incorrect joike.


What is the opposite of Christopher Reeves?





Christopher Walken.

Well,

I had originally planned on blogging after the glorious ending to a very long day. See, i've been up for about...let's see...31 hours now. I am very very very tired needless to say, and I had planned to blog after i'd seen The Office, Community, and It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, but you see, I think I might want to fall asleep after the latter is finished. You might be asking me, why are you staying awake Ben? Why didn't you just take a refreshing little nap? Well, I'm making my effort to change my life and I decided instead of going to sleep at 6 AM like I usually do I decided that instead I would just stay up and go to sleep at a reasonable time. Needless to say, today has been very tiring and it has been a struggle to stay awake all day. But, I did watch The Spirit today and fell in love in the process. My goodness, the girl who plays the young Sand something or other is absolutely gorgeous! Look her up, her name is Seychelle Gabriel. I will admit though, she's not as flattering in photos as she is in the film. But, I plan on changing that one day by being in pictures with her. Well, actually....I'll just have my fingers crossed on that dream. Today, I continued my pursuit of finding a job in a jobless market by applying at Toys R' Us and Macy's at the bequest of my friend Anthoneal. Hopefully tomorrow we will be going out to apply at more places. And I shall have my fingers crossed that I shall find a job. I still do need to fix my habit of not working out like I used to. I was planning on doing part of the p90x regimen today, but I was much too tired to do so. But I think tomorrow my father and I may start running! That's exciting! I hate running with a passion. Oh! I forgot to mention that Bryce and I, in the process of staying up, entertained ourselves by watching all of the episodes of The Guild starring Felicia Day. Some of you might know her from Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog. She played the part of Penny. Very beautiful young lady. If you haven't seen Dr. Horrible I suggest that you watch it at once! It's available on Hulu. I think it's actually the only web series to win an emmy. Well, I know I promised that my blogs would get progressively funnier, but alas today's is not so funny. Or maybe it is, I can't be sure at this point as once again, I am way too tired to function in a normal society. I will leave you with a joke, it can be taken as offensive but quite frankly one has to remember that the point of a joke is to tell a story, and with the punchline deliver something that was not expected, which is what makes the joke funny. So here goes:

Why do women wear make-up and perfume?














Because they're ugly and smelly!




I promise, that this is not my personal opinion on women. Well.....most women. Anyway, i bid you adieu.

Kimjemin out.




P.S. If you're reading this then you've probably seen the new header i've designed for my blogs! Tell me what you think of it!

Today...

has been a strange day. I started the day off by waking up at around one pm. I then spent the rest of the day doing nothing til i fell asleep watching Spin City. When i awoke Becca and Bryce were in my room which i don't have to say was embarrassing, for the fact that I was in my underwear. But Becca threw me some pants and we went on our way. We watched Julie and Julia which was a very good movie. It made me realize that I would like to cook. Actually a while back when i thought I was going to go blind i told Bryce that I wanted to make a change in my life and learn new things. I had wanted to learn to cook, to dance, and other various things. I lost sight of that somewhere along my very unproductive journey in life and I need to start reminding myself of it. I think at this point, I am going to make a change as far as night activities goes. I've always considered myself a night owl. I love the night and would rather sleep through the day, but alas, it has to end. I need to go out and get a job and start working out again and be a productive member of society. Of course, with this job market, finding a job might be hard, but hopefully I can do it. I hope that whoever is reading this will attempt to help me throughout my journey, and will wish me luck. With that, i bid you adieu.

I am going to attempt...

to have at least one new post every day for the next year. Hopefully it'll get to the point where it'll be more than that. But for right now that's it. I think i'll post the same things on my myspace so as to be more diverse and hopefully attract more readers. Wish me luck.



-Kimjemin. (I hope you don't mind me putting my signature, Jestro. It's just such a badass thing that i wanted to do it too.)

Where the Sun Don't Shine: Chapter Four

I awoke and went for a rather long stroll. I appreciated the scenery of the night sky, it seemed to be one of the few times a year that you could actually see the stars instead of just a hazy smog. That's the one thing i miss about the time before this one. They sky was always beautiful, and so were the women. Of course, that was a time when i cared not about the purity of blood and just went after anything, much like an animal. Now, I consider myself more refined, a sort of aficionado of sorts. I bumped into a homeless man and apologized briefly. His blood would not be worth spilling, for it was filthy. But wait, no, there was something different about this man. He didn't have the scent of a normal man. He smelled......like a fellow creature of the night but....not. He smelled like some sort of half-breed or some other type of creature. I decided to follow him.

I followed him to a condemned mental institution. There he took off his filthy wardrobe and what i saw before me was monstrous. He stood with his right leg shorter than the left, and his left arm became a sort of monstrous claw while his right arm remained human. His face was that of a normal human face except for one disguishable characteristic. His mouth.....was nonexistent. Well, not nonexistent, but rather he had no lips, just a round hole with teeth covering the entire circumference. Out of the shadows a woman appeared who appeared to be human.
"Please, I beg of you...." she weeped.
"Enough."
"But..."
"If you bring me a man of a high stature then i will spare the life of you and your family."
"High stature? I'm afraid I don't understand..."
"Bring me, a rich man." She started to walk away.
"I don't think I need to tell you what will happen if you don't bring him....tonight" the man said. The woman hurried away. I'd never seen anything like this man before. And what was going on with this woman? I slipped deeper into the shadows to conceal myself. Before long, the woman came back with a very average looking man.
"Come on, it's nice and empty in here, see?"
"I don't know about this. I'd rather just get a hotel room."
"Don't you have any sense of fun? Doesn't this place give you a sense of exhilaration?"
"Well yes but.....Oh my god, what the fuck is that thing?!" the average man had seen the disfigured man standing there. Before the average man could say anything more the disfigured man pounced upon him and placed his mouth on the top of the average man's head and appeared to be drinking. If there's one thing I can spot it's how a monster drinks. After all, I do it myself. The disfigured man drank and drank and slowly his disfigured parts started to become normal again and before long what stood before me was the average man. He turned to the woman.
"Now, leave. Before I change my mind" he said as she ran away. I decided now would be a good time to reveal myself in his presense.
"What exactly are you?" I said to the man.
"A monster, just think of me as a monstrous leech." He said, not at all surprised to see me.
"And you take on the forms of your victims?"
"How else should I find more people to feed upon? I mean, first it started with this here institution. Everyone in here was a tasty morsel but of course, I suffered a slight damper upon my sanity from all the meals. But I will have this whole city to feast upon one day."
"Is that....disfigured body your real form?"
"Well, it is when I haven't fed in a while. You can see from this institution that is my home that it's been quite a long while. It's very hard to feast upon people in public when you are what I am."
"And the woman? Why didn't you feast upon her?"
"Honestly, I hate taking on the form of a woman. I'd rather just threaten to take her family away from her while she watches. Then, she pleads me not to. After that I make a deal and tell her to bring me someone worthy of being eaten. Then i let her go. For the rest of her life she lives with the guilt of killing an innocent man to save her family's life, while her family goes on living carefree."
"You've done this before?"
"Well, it's what i used to do before I had happened upon this institution."
"I'm going to have to kill you."
"I know."
"It's not because of what you do, I agree with it. But, it's because of the fact that this town is a meal reserved for me. And I might never know when you might attempt to feed upon one of the 6 humans under my protection."
"Well then, we should probably stop talking and commence our battle then. Shall we?" He said as he pulled a stake from behind his back.
"By the way" he said, "what's your name?"
"Vito" I said, and i lunged.


to be continued.....

The Winners guide to winning. [Preview]

Hi, i'm a winner. And you can be too. It takes a lot to be a winner, but do what i say and it'll happen. First off, I just want you to take 20 minutes a day to just spend to yourself. I'm not talking about watching a movie or anything, i want you to sit and think. Maybe, go outside and stare at the sky and just think about everything. Think about your life and what can make it better. My name is John Smith as far you know and i'm the most average, generic person on the planet. But i'm a winner. Now unless you actually follow my instructions, your life is going to be the same shithole it's always been. I want you to really consider what i'm saying and actually put it to good use. Reading isn't everything, actions speak louder than words. I've met a lot of assholes in my life. But i'll get to that later. For now, just think.

Star Force Gemini 2 [Interview with 김재민]

I'm sitting, again, at another shop in that same downtown of that same dying city. This time I'm eating frozen yogurt, and it's delicious. Just as I sit down, I see him; I recognize him right off the back. Kim is the only one of the actors in Star Force Gemini with any sort of real acting history. I wave him down, like a fan boy. He smiles and sits down at my small table.
"Hello." He says.
"Hi. How are you today?"
"I'm okay. So shall we begin?" He prompts.
"Sure sure! Were you going to get yogurt?" I ask, off the record.
"Yeah, in a little bit." He says.
"Alright." I say and set my Mp3 recorder on the table. "So how was it coming back for another season of Star Force Gemini?"
"It was fun, we got to travel this time. And even though we didn't get to go to SK, I still enjoyed it."
"Was it hard working in Greece?" I ask.
"A little bit. Most of us felt really out of place there, but we had translators so it wasn't so bad." He says with a smile.
"Is it true that your character, 김재민, does the most fighting in this season?" I ask.
"Yeah, it's true. The creator told me that he felt my character was under used in the last season. He actually even went as far as to say we were all under used, but as far as action goes, he felt 김재민 didn't shine, so he really challenged me with this new one."
"Right, so there's an evolution to all the characters?" I ask.
"Yeah, well for one thing; Ω isn't as unstable in this season as he was in the last one, he's more of a real person, not a caricature. C41212105 is more useful, overall, in this season..." I cut him off to ask.
"Does that mean he becomes an assassin?"
"I'm not at liberty to say." He pauses. "But back to what I was saying, **SuPeRfUcKiNgStAr** becomes a lead character in this season, like she did towards the end of the last season. And um, well, [Jestro] is a completely different character. I was really blown away by the complexities that each of these characters have in this new season."
"Right, so I hear there are a few love sub-plots in this season, is that true?" I ask.
"Yeah, for the most part. 김재민 however, doesn't get one until season 3."
"There's a season three!?" I ask, excited.
"Well, um..." He pauses. "Yeah, we're all signed into a three season contract, and plus a spin-off season."
"So Star Force Gemini: The C41212105 Chronicles was a series idea?"
"Yeah, Ryan thought it would be really funny. Also, he said it'd piss off the real Ω, which he loves to do, and that it would help tie into Guild for Hired Guns, a series that the real live C41212105 is writing."
"Right, so can you tell us anything more about season three?" I ask.
"Um, no I can't because, well, we haven't started working on it yet. The only thing I do know, is that everyone dies." He grins.
"Everyone dies!?" I ask horrified.
"Hahahahaha, you'll just have to wait and see!" Then he stands up and gets some yogurt, by this time I've noticed mine has started melting so I begin to eat it.
-Steve Espino





-Sir Jestro

Star Force Gemini 2 [Interview with Ω]

As I sit, waiting, at a small coffee table in the downtown of Los Angeles. I've just ordered a passion fruit tea and keep looking out the window, my date is fifteen minutes late. I tell myself,
"If this fat Greek motherfucker isn't here in the next ten minutes, I'm leaving." I tell myself I'll just do a piece on cats or something.
But luckily, he shows up before I leave. He's a small time actor--the kind who only does TV and has just a few independent, straight to video films under his belt. I wave him down and he sits down at my table.
"You're late." I tell him.
"I was running on Ω time." He tells me. I roll my eyes, method actors.
"Let's begin this interview, shall we?" I ask setting my Mp3 recorder on the table.
"Okay." He tells me as he waves down on of the Starfucks employees.
"Yes, sir?" She asks him as she walks up to our table.
"Yeah, gimmie a peppermint hot chocolate. Thanks." Then he turns to me. "Ask me a question." Both myself and the girl employee are taken aback by this. Did he really just treat her like some kind of waitress? She has a horrified look on her face, but when he doesn't turn around she just walks back behind the counter like a zombie and makes his order. Honestly, I'm so impressed by his arrogant display of superiority that I forgive his not being punctual.
"Okay, first of all." I begin. "How was it, coming back for another season of Star Force Gemini?" I ask him.
"Well, not gonna lie," He says, taking off his ray-bans. "I didn't like it as much as I thought I would."
"And why is that?" I ask.
"Well, you see, SFG 2 takes place almost entirely in Greece, but the only problem is, it was all filmed in Athens which, don't get me wrong it's a great and beautiful city, it's just," He pauses looking back at the girl making his hot chocolate. "I really felt it should have been filmed in a more rural area, you know?"
"Right, so excluding location, how was it making Star Force Gemini Season 2?" I ask him.
"Oh, it was fucking amazing. The creator really pushed all of us to the next level on this one. If you thought the first one was insanely epic, you haven't seen anything yet."
"Right. How was it working with the same cast, I hear there has been no change in the line-up."
"Nah, the SFG crew are pretty much the same, even though [Jestro] isn't as big of a character as he was in the last one." He tells me.
"Yes, I did hear rumors he was playing the villain in this one."
"Well, he's not really the villain. I'm sorry, I can't really say too much on that subject, we have it in our contracts not to spoil any of the twists."
"So it's a twist?"
"Kind of, even though you figure it out towards the beginning." He tells me, the girl brings his hot chocolate, a world record if you ask me.
"I also hear that the creator is doing some type of viral marketing tool for season 2?"
"Yeah, a little bit. He's using two different channels for publicity, your channel being one of them."
"Right. In Star Force Gemini Season 2 you use the same weapon as before, your beam katana, is it true however, that other things have changed?"
"Yeah, I end up losing my RX7 and getting a Smart Car. It's all tricked out, it's actually really cool. I had to take all kinds of driving classes for this season."
"What other kinds of training did you have to do for this season?" I ask.
"Well, we all had to learn fighting again, and the creator wanted us to do our own stunts, he claims stunt doubles are for Steven Sagal movies."
"Everyone did all of their own stunts?" I ask.
"Yeah, the only real fake thing, was when the Eiffel Tower gets destroyed..."
My eyes widened at this, at he caught my look.
"I've said too much. This interview is over." Then he stormed out.
I was upset, at first, having only a handful of answers for my Star Force Gemini Season 2 interview from one of it's lead characters, Ω but when I realized that I still had four more people to interview, the feeling didn't feel so bad.
-Steve Espino






-Sir Jestro

Forks and Spoons: Chapter Seven.

I sat in the car while Kim drove and SK danced in the passenger seat. Some techno song was blaring out of the stereo, and i'll admit it was really catchy. We drove for probably about thirty minutes and arrived at a concert hall. I got out of the car and looked around. All of the buildings looked minuscule in comparison to the Concert Hall. A woman came out, she was librarian sexy. For those at home that don't know what that means, it's when someone looks sexy in a nerdy way. She had her hair up in a bun and a pair of glasses on and she was dressed very professionally. She was holding a clipboard up to her breast with her left arm. She spoke, "Kim, SK, what a pleasant surprise" she said in a cool english accent. "Kim I just got your message and he'll have to go through an interview process first. Is this the man?"
"Yup" Kim said.
"Ok, follow me Mr......"
"Aldrin"
"Mr. Aldrin. I like that. It sounds....homey."
I looked back and saw that Kim and SK weren't following me.
"Good luck!" SK yelled. He had a sad look on his face like he was never going to see me again. As soon as we got inside the woman turned around.
"Now this interview isn't going to be like other interviews."
"It isn't?"
"No, it isn't." She beckoned to a hallway on her left. "Go down this hallway and at the fourth door on your right is a custodial closet. You are to go and retrieve a mop and then clean out the Men's and Women's restrooms. Is that clear?"
"Does that mean I have the job?"
"I said, is that clear?"
"Erm...yes."
"Good. Then i shall check on you in thirty minutes. I have some business to attend to."
I walked to the custodial closet and retrieved a mop and other cleaning supplies and first went into the Men's room. It was the cleanest Men's room i'd ever seen. Men are nasty creatures that generally miss the urinal when urinating or fail to flush the toilet. Well, most restrooms are like that anyway. But this one wasn't. It looked as if it had never been used. I noticed the door on of the stalls was slightly crooked and upon examining it noticed that the hinge was loose. I retrieved a screwdriver from the Custodial closet and fixed the stall door. I then proceeded to polish the urinals and toilets since there wasn't much else to do. I then strode over to the Women's restroom. I opened the door and upon seeing inside my jaw dropped. Immediately upon coming into the door was a waiting room like area. There were couches and magazines as well as a couple of plants and then an open hallway seperating this room from the sinks. I just stood there for a moment. Were all Women's restrooms like this glorious room that stood before me? Just then the woman walked up behind me. "You don't need to clean this one after all. It's fine the way it is" she said as she pinched my butt. She then grabbed my hand and started walking to guide me somewhere. We walked into the actually hall part of the Concert Hall where the performances were held. She had me follow her up to the stage and then she sat down on the piano bench right in the middle of the stage. She turned to me and whispered in my ear, "Fuck me right here, right now." I nearly had a stroke because I was so surprised. I just stood there though. I didn't have the necessary....libido to do the task right now. I knew i wouldn't be able to get it up while there on that stage. I took a step back and said, "I can't. Not here." She smiled.
"Good, you passed Eric."
"Um...passed?"
"You're a realist. You know what's real and what's fake. There's no way some woman you just met would have you screw her in one of the kinkiest places possible in a Concert Hall that she owns."
"....Yeah..."
"Anyway, you will call me Amanda. Come in for work on Monday."
"Ok. Thank you."
"Oh, and Eric?"
"Yes, Amanda?"
"Clean the stage before you leave" And then she left. I stood there bewildered for a moment. That woman had to be the strangest woman i'd ever met. I cleaned the stage and then went back outside. Kim and SK were still standing there. SK asked, "Well, what happened?"
"I got the job" I said. Kim just looked amused. SK looked at Kim then looked at me. "What did she have you do? Kim will never tell me how she interviews people."
"Believe me SK, you wouldn't believe me if i told you."
"Fine! I don't wanna know anyway!" SK shouted as he got in the car and then closed the door. Kim turned to me and smiled. "Eric" he said as I was getting in the car.
"Yeah, Kim?"
"You would've still got the job if you'd done it" he said as he started laughing. Then he closed the door. Well, shit.

It's weird.

I just finished watching Adventureland, and it's left me in somewhat of a depressed mood. Along with not leaving the house today, the two make a lethal combination. Adventureland had Ryan Reynolds in it and his character was.....a poser, I guess that's the best word for it. But this movie has left me in a mood. Right now I have no job, but want to have one. I almost got a job but couldn't because of my eyes. The day i was going to apply was the day i got that infection. Right now it feels like the world is against me. I want a job but at the same time don't know what will happen if i get a job. Will I become a mindless drone catering to the rise and fall of the business cycle of corporate America? Will i just go through the cycle of just working and never getting anywhere? The present always keeps me in a state of confusion i think. And the future is something to hope and want and keep as a goal. My future is uncertain at this point. I'm stuck at a crossroads. I don't know what exactly to do. And i can't help feeling as if I wouldn't feel as bad if i just had someone to hold close and talk to. Someone who i could talk to on the phone. I hate talking on the phone. But i would love it for just one person to make me look forward to it. I miss being in a relationship. I've always been told i'm a good boyfriend. But, no one ever wants to date me. Women are strange creatures. I don't think anyone will ever understand them. I know i won't. Well, i suppose that's the end of my rant.

On the subject of 11 years.

Upon writing it last night i realized that it is really really stupid. I wanted one thing and ended up creating another. So that said, i'm going to scrap it.

If you want to know what the ending was, it's that he's insane. It's all in his head. Father, Nathan, The Werewolf, The Archangel, Cool Devil, all of them are in his head. He is them. The only other real person in the story that he's had interaction with was the guy who was going to kill him and Madison who had no idea that he was insane. But she had known him before he disappeared for 11 years.

So that's it. Everything else i will continue to write.

Where the Sun Don't Shine: Chapter Three.

This morning, and by morning i mean before dawn, I awoke and sensed a strange presence. Upon going outside of my room, i saw lights shining through the curtains from what looked like that girl's room. But as I peered through the window I saw nothing but the streetlights. Strange. Perhaps i'd make an actual appearance today to tell her about it, and maybe correct her mispronunciation of my name. I waited until after she had cleaned her fang...err teeth. I can't stand the stench of morning human breath. I made a casual appearance as to look as if i had just bumped into her. I smelled her to make sure she didn't need to be deep cleaned. She actually smelled fairly decent. I was pleased. I sat down on the couch, it was rather soft and strange. I constantly felt like i was sinking into it. Whatever happened to wooden benches? Simple, and straight to the point. I started to talk to her. "I wanted to see if we could converse about an unusual occurance i saw this morning." She sighed and was staring into my eyes. It was a bit creepy. And that is coming from a vampire. I noticed she wasn't moving. I waved my hand in front of her face. "Hello? Young lady? Will you snap out of it?" She was still staring at me as if i was the most beautiful thing on the world. I mean, i'm flattered but....not interested.She was sitting there breathing heavily as she started to come to. As she did this I noticed that the smell of her blood was decadent with flavors pleasing to my nasal cavities. It was the equivalent of smelling pork...or bacon for a human. She must have noticed the way I was looking at her for she said, "Are you a vampire?"
I chuckled, "Yes."
"Do you sparkle in the sunlight?" I rolled my eyes in disgust. What creature was this that was tainting the noble name of Vampire, or Vampyre as they first called us.
"Is that a no?"
"Listen, there were some lights outside of your room during the early part of the morning."
"I don't know what you're talking about but it kind of reminds me of my dream: I was lying a a cold metal bed, I could feel a thin blanket covering me. It felt like it was made of the same stuff that shower curtains are made out of. Like vinyl or plastic or something. IDK."
"IDK?"
"It means I don't know. Duh, Bido!"
"My name is.."
"But anyway, I'm lying there and these bright lights are facing down at me. Like I'm on an operation table, and the faces that're looking down at me are really long. Like a really long triangle, with two big black, shinny eyes staring down at me. There were three of them, two on my right and one on my left.
I heard beeping" I stopped listening and wondered if i should go to sleep. I didn't know how to make this human stop talking. I had just wanted to warn her.
"...I could feel them tapping with pointed hooks against my gums, but it didn't really hurt. I know it was only a dream; but ever since I watched "Darkness Falls" with Jonathan a few years ago on Halloween, I've always been afraid if The Tooth Fairy. I think this might be a way of my brain telling me I'm crazy, or that I should confront my fear of The Tooth Fairy."
"Well um, i suppose that explains the smell.." She seemed to perk up and she pressed her bags of fat together and whispered, "I'm bleeding down there.."
I threw up a little bit in my mouth. That has never happened to me in my many years on this planet. Ironic, that when i throw up blood it just means I need to wipe it and keep living. But when a human throws up blood, it means they are soon to die.

11 Years: Chapter Eight.

Chapter Eight: The phone rings.

The Delivery Man laid there with Madison just running his fingers lightly along her skin with care. She was telling him about how much she loved his car and if she could maybe drive it later. But he had other things on his mind. What was his next job going to be? Just as he was guessing, he heard a screech and then the harsh sound of metal wrapping itself around a metal lightpost. He got up and looked out the window. A man was standing there with blood dripping down his face. "Come out Louis, i know it's you" he said as he smiled. "Who are you?" The Deliver Man replied.
"You never met me but my name is Nathan. Nathan Reynolds. You ruined my life. But now you're going to fix it. Nathan jumped up the fire escape and started climbing up towards the window. The Delivery Man backed away from the window and closed it. He turned to Madison. "I want you to go inside the bathroom and don't come out until I tell you to. Is that understood?"
"Yeah, but what's going on?"
"Don't worry about it" he said with a smirk. He watched her run into the bathroom and stared at the door for a little bit after she went inside. His heart felt warm. He was jolted out of his dream like state with the sound of the window breaking. Nathan jumped at him with a broken shard of glass in his hand. The Delivery Man dodged it with finesse and slammed Nathan into the wall. Nathan started laughing and all of a sudden got free and pulled out a gun and shot The Delivery Man in the stomach and then ran through the front door and out of the apartment. The Delivery Man crawled over to the phone and saw a note next to it. His hands shaking from the pain he read the note. "We're aware that this man wanted revenge. Don't call an ambulance, we'll take care of you. -Father" Just then Madison came out of the bathroom. "Oh my god! Are you ok? I'm going to call 911!"
"No, don't"
"And why the hell not? You're bleeding all over my carpet for god's sake, and...." She trailed off as her eyes fell upon the gun that had put the bullet into The Delivery Man's stomach.
"Is that it?"
"Is what it?"
"The gun that he shot you with."
"He left it here?"
"I guess so. Did he say anything?"
"You didn't hear him laughing like an idiot before he shot me?"
"No, i didn't hear anything but the gunshot." And then The Delivery Man passed out. When he woke up he was in a hospital room. "Fuck" he thought to himself. A cell phone rang and he looked around for it and found it sitting under his pillow. He answered, "Um...hello?"
"....what did i tell you not to do?"
"not to call an ambulance"
"...and why was that?"
"Because you said you were going to take care of me?"
".....right. That's two strikes you know."
"I know, i'm sorry I...."
Click.
The Delivery Man put the phone down. Just then Madison walked into the room.
"Hey, how are you feeling?" At that point The Delivery Man realized that he wasn't feeling at all. "I...uh....don't know"
"Hahaha, they got you so full of morphine you don't know how you feel."
"Yeah i uh...guess so"
"So the doctor was able to get you all fixed up ok. I guess the bullet went clear through you. He musta been pretty close."
"Yes, he was."
"What's wrong? Do you need anything?"
"As a matter of fact, could you hand me the cell phone right there?" Madison looked around.
"What phone?"

Forks and Spoons: Chapter 6

That morning after SK assured the women that we'd call them and made sure they wouldn't remember where the house was we sat down and Baldy started making us breakfast. "How do you want your eggs Eric?" he said in the most feminine voice i'd ever heard a male have. "Um, sunny side up please" I said. I turned to SK and asked him whose house this was anyway. Instead of answering he slid a picture frame over to me and sipped on his iced tea. I looked down and saw a beautiful black man surrounded by about 12 of the most beautiful asian women i'd ever seen. Without a chance to even say anything SK answered me, "He fucked them all in a glorious gangbang. It's like one of those kinky japanese porns you watch except 100% real." I looked back down. "So...this black guy owns this house?"
"Yes, right now he's in Japan on a business trip. Fucking more women no doubt." Just then the phone rang and SK slid his chair over to the counter with the phone base and picked the phone up. "Antone Asty's house. How may i be of service to you? Antone! Hey buddy!......Yeah the house is doing great!......no we didn't fuck anyone on your bed.......I TOLD you! I sat on the edge of the bag! Not on your fucking burrito! Maybe they MADE it like that! Did you ever consider that? Well shut the fuck up, you're never going to let me live that down are you?......yeah you stay sexy too." He turned to me and scoffed. Baldy served us breakfast, and it was glorious. 3 Pounds of bacon, the most delicious eggs you'd ever tasted, the best seasoned hash browns i'd ever tasted, and a nice glass of OJ to wash it down. Kim was standing behind me and startled me. "I smelled the food" he said as he sat down and made himself a plate. As i finished i turned to SK, and licked my lips as to get all of the yolk off of my face. "It's good isn't it? SK said. "Yeah" i replied.
"Basically Baldy realized he needed to learn to make delicious food to get the taste of that nasty greek dick out of his mouth."
"I heard that you wiener nose!" said Bozo's voice from another room. "Alright so, Eric, we have to get you a job. Because believe it or not, women don't like men without jobs. Ask Midnight."
"Who's Midnight?"
"DON'T interrupt me. Now, what can you do? What skills do you have?"
"Well I can play the piano fairly well, um let's see...."
"I think, you'd be a good janitor." I sat there and just kind of looked at SK. "I'm fucking with you pal!"
"Ok good."
"But seriously. You gotta start somewhere. It's true! In order to get somewhere, you gotta start somewhere. I know, I read it in a magazine once!" He grabbed me and stood up. "Go take a shower and meet me down here in 20. I'll get you an interview. KIM!!!! Call the concert hall!"
"Kay!" Kim said. So, that morning I took a shower and went to the strangest interview of my life. And, on top of that I still did not know who Midnight was.

Where the Sun Don't Shine: Chapter Two

I walked briskly among the many people of the night. I smelled the aroma of the different flavors that i was walking amongst. Tourist attractions are always the best place to get a good meal without having to go too far. The food comes to you. As i browsed the menu a woman caught my eye. Could it be? No it couldn't. I had killed her many years ago. There was no way it could be her. Still, i followed my instinct and her scent. It brought me to an italian restaurant. She stood outside pondering if she should go inside. The stench of garlic filled my nose. I gagged and she noticed me. She turned around and said, "Oh my god are you alright?"
"Yes" i replied, "I'm fine" She noticed before i did that my fangs had been exposed.
"Oh my god" she said under her breath as i walked up to her. I smiled. She looked up in my eyes and said, "You're like Edward!" I stopped. Was she already the mistress of another vampire? She looked at me and said, "Do you sparkle in the sun like him?" Whoever this mysterious Edward was, he couldn't be a vampire. I feasted on her blood. It tasted like ignorance. I did what i hadn't done since I'd first been turned. I feasted so ravishly that I received a high from it. The world spun as I stumbled back towards my apartment. Hopefully I would make it before the sun rose. I saw her face everywhere i went and it enraged me. I remember how juvenile I had been. It had been before i had become what i was. She was my first love. Sienna had been her name. It had been three years of innocence that I had spent with her. And it changed one night when she came into the house with blood all over her clothes. I cleaned her up and noticed two bite marks on the side of her neck and blood stains on her teeth. When she finally awoke at dawn the next day she screamed and slept under the bed for the remainder of the day. Then, that night when i had gone to give her a meal she attacked me. She slammed me into the walls with a strength I had never felt before. She had the most hideous fangs and her beauty was gone with this beast that was now in front of me. She bit me and my arms and legs would not work. I chose to do the only thing i could, bite her back. I bit into her and her blood spilled into my mouth and she screamed. I was able to move my arms and legs again when she let go and i kicked her off of me and ran out of the house. She ran.....no flew after me faster than anything i'd ever seen. I ran as fast as i could while throwing things behind me and got out of the house by jumping through a window. I ran to the church to find help from this beast of Satan. I didn't quite make it that far but i managed to make it to the cemetary. I saw a wooden cross sticking out of the ground of a nearby grave and broke it off of it's root piece. I stabbed her with it and she screamed. She backhanded me and i flew into the gate of the cemetary. She flew towards me and i grabbed her and slammed her onto the sharp rail of the gate. I saw a priest running toward me holding a knife. He threw me a metal cross and i caught it. "Hold it facing her, my son!" He yelled. I did as he told me and he ran up to her with the knife and beheaded her. I thanked him for saving my life. Little did i know that this man would become my worthiest foe. But that's a story for another time. I said my goodbye to the priest and started to walk back towards my home. I looked down at my hands and saw one of them was covered in blisters. The one that had been holding the cross. The memory faded away as I arrived at the apartment complex, I walked up to the apartment and through the front door where i saw a young man i had taken in on the couch. "Fuck man, it's like four in the morning and you're barely coming home?"
"Dawn's about to break. Came home as fast as i could. You know i hate daytime. The day hides the real action. All of the good sins happen at night."
"Yeah, yeah whatever." I walked to my room and quietly closed the door. I wondered if my actions seemed to arouse the interests of anyone else besides the Zach boy. If the girl, Becky, as she liked to be called or her cousin had noticed his strange habits. No, it didn't seem like they did. Becky always called him the wrong name though. One day he'd correct her. Vito, dear, not Bido. Bido sounds like a dog. I, am a beast.

Update.

So 11 years and Villain's and Vigilante's are still a go and i will be writing them.

Forks and Spoons still needs a little research on my part. I want to make it good.

Now the two new roommate stories, I don't want to continue writing them until i have titles. I was just about to post the second chapter of the vampire one but the lack of a title annoys me. Help me out!

Holiday Voices: Chapter One

Zach Holiday woke up with a start. He looked around to make sure he was ok. He looked up and the doorway and saw his nocturnal roommate coming in the front door. "Fuck man, it's like four in the morning and you're barely coming home?" "Dawn's about to break. Came home as fast as i could. You know i hate daytime. The day hides the real action. All of the good sins happen at night." "Yeah, yeah whatever." His roommate walked into his room and quietly closed the door. Zach stood up, his back ached from sleeping on the couch. He walked over to the fridge and opened it and looked inside. Then he closed the door and looked in the freezer. Then he looked back in the fridge. He mumbled to himself, "....four fuckin people in this house and not one of us buys any food..." He walked sleepily back to the couch and yawned then he went to sleep. When he woke up in the morning he was on the ground behind the couch and wearing his shoes which had mud all over them. He looked towards the front door and saw muddy footsteps leading up to where he was currently laying. "Ah shit!" he yelled as he jumped up. He took off his shoes and went and grabbed the swiffer he had bought last week. It didn't help with the mud, all he managed to do was just kind of spread it all over the floor. He grabbed a towel and wet it and wiped up all the mud. He sat there relieved that none of his roommates had seen the mud all over the floor. "Fuck, it's a good thing Mr. Nocturnal over there didn't see. He'd fuckin freak." Vito, or Mr. Nocturnal as Zach liked to call him, was covering his rent this month because Zach had been accused of stealing a book from the museum he worked at and subsequently fired. Zach stood up and went in the bathroom and took a shower. He closed his eyes when the water hit him and all of a sudden he was at the museum facing a very scared looking curator. A voice that was not his own came out, "Where is the sword? You must tell me within the next five seconds or your life will be no more!" "I don't know what you're talking about! Listen Zach, i know you didn't steal the book but you have to get out of here before the cops come, i've already hit the panic button they'll be here any minute!" A scream of fury like Zach had never heard before erupted from him, "Then you die, pitiful human." All of a sudden the curator was melting like an antagonist from an Indiana Jones movie. He turned around and suddently Zach was in the shower again. He let out a scared breath and looked around. He spoke and heard his own voice. "Fuck." he muttered to himself. He was even having the nightmares he'd been having for the last two days when he was awake. He got out of the shower and looked in the fogged up mirror and saw two demonic looking eyes staring back at him. He screamed and then wiped the mirror and saw nothing but his own face. "I am WAY too stressed right now" he said to himself and walked out of the bathroom. He put on some boxers and sat down on the couch and turned on the TV. He got up to get himself a bowl of cereal. As he glanced up at the tv he dropped the carton of milk spilling it all over the floor he had just cleaned. On the TV was a reporter standing in front of a crime scene at the museum. The Curator had disappeared that night and also a new book that the museum was going to be showcasing in a grand event tonight. It was the same book that Zach had been accused of stealing.

Where the Sun Don't Shine: Chapter One.

I stood in an alleyway and thought to myself, "How cliche." I grabbed my victim and feasted upon her delicious life force. It's not that i necessarily need blood to live anymore. I figured that out a while back. But it's like this: a human doesn't require steak but it is a luxury that is well appreciated. That is how blood is for me. I don't necessarily need it anymore but, it's just so good. Although people these days are staining their own blood with their sins. They are so self-absorbed in their gluttony, lust, and their drugs. It's hard to find good blood anymore. It almost shames me that i must feast upon children because they are the only truly innocent ones nowadays. If only things were the way they were when i'd first been turned. I still remember the day back in 1192, when i'd been a young stupid warrior in The Crusades as their now called. Back then we'd referred to it as Purgatio sursum spurcamen which translates literally to "Cleaning up the filth". I remember those days well. I remember every minute of every day up until this day. I have been alive to see the rise and fall of humanity. I have seen things you would wish you'd never have seen. I looked in the face of evil. But i'll get to that later. It all started, as many origin stories do, with a party. Or, i guess you can call it a festivity. It all amounts to the same activities: drinking large amounts of alcohol and having sex with many women.

Villain's and Vigilante's: Chapter Seven

Bidel, Nicholas, and Yunmi stood there silently for a moment. Then their silence was interrupted by Bidel's stomach growling. Yunmi glared at him. "What? I'm fuckin 'ungry! There's nothin i can do about that sweet cheeks!"
"Don't call me sweet Cheeks you dirty Irish man"
"Now, now. There's no need to get hostile, I just think as long as we're in this situation we can have a little fun."
"Did i ever tell you why it was that i went to prison? I cut a man's penis off and used a knife to stick into his forehead."
"See, now when you say things like that it kind of makes me want to not have sex with you so much." Bidel started walking away.
"Where are you going?" Nicholas shouted.
"To get my dick wet!" Bidel replied. Nicholas looked over at Yunmi. "We don't really have a choice but to follow him" Nicholas said. Yunmi nodded and they started to follow him. They'd only walked about twenty feet when suddenly a man jumped down from a building in front of Bidel. "Stop your quest and you won't be harmed." Bidel looked at him and said, "What are we in the fuckin 18th century? Talk like a normal bloke you idiot!" He turned back to look at Nicholas and Yunmi, "Get a load of..." and then the man hit Bidel in the jaw. Bidel turned to him and looked at him with a smirk. "You're going to regret that, idiot." Bidel then whipped his axe around and swung at the idiot's shoulder blade. The idiot blocked it with his arm and punched Bidel again. Bidel tried pulling the axe out of the idiot's arm but it was wedged in there. So he grabbed his other axe and hit the idiot's other shoulder blade. The idiot stood there. He then lifted his leg up and kicked Bidel in the chest spartan style. "You've been warned" he said. And then he disappeared. "What....the.....fuck.....is going the fuck on!" Bidel screamed like a little baby.
Nicholas looked around and said, "I really don't know anymore. But apparently we don't have to anymore looking. Whoever we wanted is looking for us now." They decided to get a hotel room but Bidel refused. "I can get us a place." He walked into a bar and came out with a blonde, very slutty looking girl. "She says we can stay the night at her place. She has no roomates and lives alone and values the company. More my company that yours but whatever." He smiled that sadistic smile of his. They went back to the slutty blonde's house and Yunmi and Nicholas sat in the living room while Bidel and the slutty blonde went into her bedroom. The walls were very thin so they kept hearing things like, "Fuck me harder, harder, HARDER!" and "Take that you dirty little cockgobbler" and eventually they heard, "BITCH!" a few moans, and then the slutty blonde's scream. Bidel walked out of the room covered in blood. Nicholas stared at him in amazement. "Why are you covered in blood?"
"Take a look" Bidel smiled with blood in his teeth. They peered inside the room and instantly smelled sex and blood. Not a good mix. On the bed they saw the woman laying in a pool of blood with her arm in a different corner of the room and her eyes wide open in a shocked expression. There was blood dripping out of her chest with Bidel's axe still wedged into it. Bidel walked up behind them, "At first we were talkin dirty but when she said, 'fuck me with your small irish dick' well....i did that."

Forks and Spoons: Chapter 5

It turned out that i didn't have any condoms. I'd totally forgot that none of this had been planned, that i'd just met these guys today. That only 4 hours ago i'd left my apartment to just get coffee. I told SK i had no condoms and he said, "Alright that's cool. Come on let's get some really fast. KIM!" Kim looked up. SK shouted, "We'll be right back! Kthanxbye!" Kim nodded. I glanced at Bozo who looked uncomfortable until a bald came strolled up to him and they kissed passionately. I glanced at Donner who was talking to three girls at once. SK pulled me behind him and we walked outside the bar. We walked into a store close by and went to get some condoms. We passed by an aisle and then SK did a double take and went to stare at an employee's ass. "Oh my god. It's glorious" he said. Someone walked up behind us and said, "Isn't it?" I turned around and stepped back and then my jaw dropped. It was an employee who worked at the store but to my surprise him and SK looked exactly alike. Like they could have been twins. Except for the fact that SK was probably a good six years older. The employee looked down at his Hello Kitty watch and looked up and said, "Break time!" And then he left. We went and got the condoms and took them up to the register. "I remember a time when I used to work at a store like this." "Really?" "Yeah, except mine was called CVX." I laughed. "There's a lot of CV...somethings out there." "Yes, yes there is" "So what happened?" I said as we started walking back to the bar. "Well, my career took off and now i'm the man you see today." "What exactly do you do SK?" "I'm a writer. And i've got an anime in the works. Maybe you've heard of it, it's called SFG" I had heard of it. At this very moment i was actually wearing SFG boxers. "Really? That's awesome!" "Yeah, I remember when i was working that job i had thoughts that just working like that was going to be all that i would ever do. I didn't realize hope was all i needed. Hope and just using the talent i'd always had." We got to the front of the bar and SK punched the bouncer in the nose. "Almost!" the bouncer yelled. "Really?" "Nope. You're never going to do it SK." We walked back inside and a couple of the girls looked really excited to see us. They ran up to us and said, "Kim was telling us all about how you guys saved those orphans from that burning building! That's such a heroic story!" SK smiled and whispered in my ear, "Kim is one of the best Wingmen (or Wingman's) you'll ever meet." We sat down and had a couple of drinks. To be honest, I can't really tell you what happened that night because I don't remember it. I remember various things like being handcuffed, some stuff with ice cubes, other various things. But what i do know, is that i woke up naked on a trampoline with four naked girls asleep all around me. When i looked up I also saw SK's face in the window giving me a thumbs up and him smiling with his tongue sticking out of his teeth and his eyes closed. And i knew right then, these friends were going to be the best i'd ever had.

Forks and Spoons: Chapter 4

When Bozo came back he was holding a polo shirt, a blazer, a pair of nice looking jeans, and a pair of new puma's. I put them on and everything fit perfectly. "How did you know my size?" I asked him, "It's obvious weiner nose. Now shut up. We're going to Donny's." "Donny's?" "It's a bar downtown." "But i have no..." "We'll put it on our friend Jose's tab. It's no problem. He likes spending money anyway." "Ok" As the three of us walked out the door SK made a phonecall. "Hey, be at Donny's in 5. Bring Donner" Then he hung up. When we got to Donny's I saw that it looked more like a club than it did a bar. There was a line going outside and a bouncer. SK walked straight up to the bouncer and punched him in the nose. The Bouncer looked him straight in the face and then laughed. "You're never gonna do it SK, You've been telling me since the first day i started workin here that you was gonna break my nose, but you don't work out. You'll never do it!" Then he let us in. When we got into the bar i saw that it looked pretty much just like a normal bar. I didn't really see any reason for there to be a line. But then i looked around and realized that everyone here was either attractive looking or wealthy looking. We walked up to the bar and the bartender there asked us what we wanted. I got a beer, Bozo got and appletini, and SK ordered and iced tea. "You mean Long Island Iced tea?" The bartender said to SK. "No, i mean like a regular Iced tea." "You know this is a bar right?" "You know you're bein a douchebag right?" Then a husky man who was also behind the bar walked up to the bartender and said, "Go serve those ladies some buffalo wings ya idiot." He turned to SK, "Sorry bout him. He's new. Here's your Iced tea SK." "Thanks Esteban." We turned around and saw two guys waving at us from a booth. We walked over and they stood up. One of them was a fit looking guy with anime looking hair who looked either mexican or half asian. The other was a huskier guy with longish hair a lip piercing and a thin beard. SK said, "Hey guys this is Eric. I decided to take him on as my protege." I gave SK a weird look. The anime hair guy laughed. "Well, Everyone calls me Kim." I shook his hand and then the other guy shook my hand and said, "Yo, if you're SK's protege you ain't got nothin to worry about. This guys a pimp. I'm Donner by the way." We all sat down and talked for a while. Well, most of us. Kim didn't really say much and Donner did most of the talking out of all of us. Kim was staring intently at something so i turned around to look. Standing next to the bar was a group of what looked like sorority girls and one of them was blowing him kisses. I looked back at him and all he did was nod his head. I looked back to the sorority girls and they were whispering in a group. Then they all faced our booth and started walking over. SK leaned over and said in my ear, "Hope you've got condoms, this is going to be your rebound tonight."

Forks and Spoons: Chapter 3

Upon arriving at Starfucks SK proceeded to hit on the girl behind the counter. His charm amazed me. Upon just walking in and smiling at her you could see the girl just blushing immensely. Within seconds he had her number as well as free drinks for me and him. We sat down and he took a sip of his coffee, "You know, I don't really like coffee. I prefer Monster Java. I just come here for the chicks." He looked over at me. I didn't say anything. "Eric, we really need to do something about your wardrobe selection. A sweater and Sweats? Come on man. In order to be successful you need to dress successful. Come on, we got somewhere to go." As we stepped out of Starfucks he took out his phone and dialed a number, "Hey bitch. We're comin over. I got a job for you." He then hailed a taxi and we got in. He made me pay. When we arrived at the house i was thoroughly impressed. It was very big with lawn sculptures of various thing, one of them being a DJ. We walked to the front door and just as SK was about to knock the door opened and a husky man with a Faux Hawk Mullet and a peacoat opened the door. "Oh god." He said as he looked at me. SK turned to me and said, "This is my friend Bozo. He'll teach you how to look like....well....to look NOT like a hobo. He's gay, but don't let that scare you. He has a boyfriend. Actually..." He turned to Bozo, "Where is Baldy anyway?" "You shut your fucking mouth you lil shit" Bozo said. "He has a disease ok? If you ever talk about my lover like that again i'll pop you in the mouth." "Fine, fine" SK sighed. We walked inside and i noticed that the whole place was empty. "Why is..." Bozo didn't let me finish before he said, "I prefer to spend my money on clothes rather than furniture. I used to spend it on cars but, back then i was in the closet and thought if i had a nice car that people would perceive me as more of a straight man" "Oh..." We walked up the stairs and Bozo turned around and said, "I'll be right back" Then he walked into a room and closed the door.

Forks and Spoons: Chapter 2.

It had been two months since my piece of shit wedding. I was now just lounging around my apartment naked eating cereal all day. I no longer had a best friend thanks to that famed debacle. I looked out the window and saw a flock of crows flying by. Then i noticed amidst the crows that there was a dove. Normally i'd consider this a good omen but since my wedding i haven't had too much of a positive attitude. However i did decide that maybe i'd actually leave the apartment today. I threw on a sweater and some sweats and stumbled over to the door and put on my shoes. I thought to myself, "Where to go? Where to go?" I walked over to a local coffee shop across the street from my apartment complex. The line was coming out of the door. I took my place at the end behind a tall skinny white guy. He was staring at a nearby woman's ass. I took a look myself and noticed that it was rather big. The guy caught me looking and said, "Hey that's my ass! Find your own!" I scoffed. Fuckin jerk. The girl with the ass turned around and caught him staring and slapped him. He turned around and glared at me, "Look what you did you fuck!" "Sorry" I muttered. "Well, i guess i can forgive you. You look like shit!" "Yeah, i had a uh....bad day a while ago..." "Fuck! How long ago?" I cleared my throat, "Errherm, two months or so" "Fuck! And you're still moping around?" "Well yeah. My best friend kind of admitted that he was in love with my fiance at our wedding. She left me for him." "Fuck, that's harsh. You know what you need? Some nice pussy!" I let out a laugh, "Sorry if i'm not too enthusiastic but i'd like to just get my coffee and go back to my apartment" "Listen here, uh....what's your name?" "Eric, Eric Aldrin" "Well Eric Eric Aldrin, I've decided that i'm going to get you laid! Today is your lucky day!" He was getting louder by the moment. His voice was pretty loud and deep to begin with. "Eric, how old are you anyway?" "I'm 23." "FUCK!" "what?" "Nothing. Anyway my name is Derrick Scott-Kirea and i'm going to be your next best friend. Call me SK for short." "But your name is Derrick." "Do i look like i give a fuck? Come on we're going to Starfucks for some real coffee!" "Where?" "Starfucks! Man!"
Little did i know that SK really was going to become my best friend. And because of him i would meet the love of my life.

Here goes.

Dear Readers, Or should i say Dear Ryan and sometimes Ralph, I am trying to get back into the groove of writing. It's hard as you can clearly see being that my last two posts are not very long at all. I've decided that i need to take notes on Villain's and Vigilante's. I might scrap 11 years, i dunno we'll see. And i need to do more research for Forks and Spoons. I'm probably going to spend a lot of my time watching black and white romances. Thank you. I love you two. If anyone else is actually reading this then you should comment something so i know i have more than two readers.

Forks and Spoons: Chapter 1.

I stood there, looking at my soon to be bride and i couldn't help but smile. All the things that i'd been through to finally find her. To finally find "the one". In this one moment i was the happiest i've ever been. I felt tears start to well up in my eyes. This day had finally come. I looked at my best man who had actually introduced me to my bride. He had been my best friend since the seventh grade and had always been there for me. He always looked cheerful but for some reason at that moment he looked really uneasy. I looked over at the minister as he said, "....speak now, or forever hold your peace" At that moment my best friend, my best man, the guy who has been there with me through thick and thin, the guy who introduced me to my beautiful bride shouted, "I love you!" I chuckled, "I love you too man" I said. He shook his head and turned to my bride. "I never should have introduced you to him, because the fact of the matter is that i'm in love with you. I always have been. Don't marry him, it'll be the biggest mistake of your life. Because no matter how much he loves you it'll never be enough. I will love you for as long as i live. Come away with me." And just like that, my wedding was ruined. And so starts the story of Forks and Spoons, a romantic comedy.

Villain's and Vigilante's: Chapter Six

Bidel stood with his back to Yunmi and Nicholas. He was facing the alley wall. "Fuck! I wish i at least knew what the fuck was going on!" he screamed in his irish accent. Nicholas looked down at his feet and then up at Yunmi, he couldn't help staring at her. Yunmi glanced over and Nicholas adverted his eyes at once. Yunmi cleared her throat and said, "I'm sure we'll find clues. I mean there has to be something mystical about this girl for her to get us out of our prisons. "She's got a point" Nicholas said to Bidel. Bidel turned around and looked at the both of them. "I think i've got an idea." Just as they turned around to follow Bidel, the girl appeared in front of them. She was covered in a greenish bluish hue and appeared transparent. "What if everything you've ever known to be true was proven false? What if every straight line was actually a circle? Leading you back to where you started just as you finish, only to begin again? What if every choice that the human race has made has been the wrong one? Are we doomed to a flawed existence that never should have been? What if life, as it comes down to it, is simply supposed to be survival of the fittest and war was the only way to bring it about? What if in our search for peace, we found that peace was a darker hell than any war could ever bring?" And then she disappeared. There was silence for a few minutes as they soaked up what the girl had said. Then Bidel looked at Nicholas and Yunmi and quietly said, "What the fuck is that supposed to mean?"

The Night Falls Hard.

Dr. Peter Nealon received a call at 2 o'clock in the morning. "Hello?" he mumbled half asleep. "Hey Peter, it's me." "Kurt? I thought you were in Africa?" "No i got back last night. There's something I need you to look at for me." "Um, can you give me twenty minutes?" "Sure." "Alright see you in a few." Peter hung up the phone and got in the shower. He washed away his grogginess and replaced it with renewed vigor. He got in his car and drove to Kurt's house and rang the doorbell. Kurt opened the door with bandages all around his body. "Geez Kurt? What the hell happened to you?" "That's why I asked you to come over, come inside and i'll show you." Peter came inside and sat down on the couch. Kurt started to unwrap himself while he talked. "While I was in Africa I was doing some research and heard about this isolated cannibal tribe. I thought it sounded interesting so I decided to investigate it. I went looking for them and took a pistol, just in case you know? Well I reached the cavern that they were rumored to be in. I was hiding out when all of a sudden i was attacked by someone who bit me on my right shoulder and the fucker kept trying to eat me alive! I shot him in the face and ran for my life. Anyway at first I though that it was just infected, but the skin started to rot away and it spread." By this time all of the bandages were off. Peters jaw dropped. All of Kurt's body was completely rotting flesh. By the looks of it he should've been a corpse. Peter took a deep breath and said, "I've actually never seen anything like this before. I don't even know what could be causing that. Just then Kurt started seizuring. Peter jumped up and put his hand in Kurt's mouth to make sure he didn't swallow his tongue. As he did this he watched Kurt's eyes come back from the back of his head with a slightly reddish hue. "What the fuck?" Peter said. Kurt bit down hard and Peter pulled his hand out, "What the fuck do you think you're doing?!" Kurt jumped forward and bit down on Peter's Jugular. Peter didn't get a chance to scream before he was dead. Somewhere in a house in a quiet suburban neighborhood, a doctor had died and no one would know what tragedy was to follow.

Villains and Vigilantes: Chapter Five

Bidel and Nicholas were breaking noses one night in a club when they noticed a change in the air. Bidel looked up from the bloody body that laid before him and saw a woman walking towards them. The woman appeared to be of asian descent and was very beautiful. She held a katana in each hand and one of them had already b een stained with blood. Bidel tapped Nicholas on the shoulder, "that might be the sexiest thing i've ever seen." Nicholas looked up at her and said, "yeah, she's very gorgeous." "Not the girl stupid, look at the way that blood drips off of that katana." The woman walked up to them and put her stained katana in the man lying on the ground. With a groan the man's life left his body. "My name is Yunmi, the girl appeared to me also." Bidel looked down at the cropse with a katana protruding from it's chest. "Boy, this girl sure can choose em" he said with a chuckle.

Here's the dealio.

I'm in the Rcc writing lab right now but i REALLY don't feel like writing. So, i'm going to try to get in the mood by just talkin about jack shit in a blog. Fuckity fuckaloo this is hard. I do not want to be here :(

Insanity.

Ok, so this is inspired by a song i heard recently. I wanted to try making a speech that depicted a man slowly going insane throughout his speech. Here goes.



Every morning i wake up and stumble sleepily to the bathroom. In the bathroom i proceed to remove my Boxer briefs and step into the shower where i clean myself thoroughly. After i step out of the shower, I brush my teeth and choose a perfect Q-tip to get the job done right. I then shave and then apply my deodorant to my underarms. I then take a small amount of wax and apply it to my hair and then style it according to my personal preference. Most of the time, it turns out to be a Faux Hawk. I then take the trek back to my room where i choose my wardrobe for the day ahead of me. One can never be sure of what will be required, but I make sure that i'm as well prepared as can be. I then choose the shoes that i am going to wear for that day and continue on my way to whatever destination i am required to be at. Every day is a constant struggle for me, i take small strides in my viewing of the world because overexposure just might kill my freewill. Which makes it very difficult to use the stairs. I take the elevator up to the fifth floor of the mall elevator and walk straight to my own little desk behind the customer service counter. Every day i repeat these same exact steps. These steps are essential to keep my sanity. I recall one morning when i forgot to clean my ears with a Q-tip. That morning was absolutely horrible. I was 7 minutes late for work and as a result got home about 14 hours late. Or was it 14 days? No, i'm right. It was minutes. Or wait. 7 days is a week? So that means 14 days would be 3 days too many for the chinese new year. But then again, the irish aren't too happy with the result. But as long as i tie my shoes everyday those potato eating bastards can't get me. Now where was I? Oh yes. Every morning i wake up and stumble drunkily to the bathroom where i take off all of your clothes and start to make love to you in the shower. I make sure the purity and cleanliness of the shower is tainted by our dirty act so that no one can ever feel safe again. After we do our bodily fluid exchange, I step outside and brush the ticks out of my hair so that they can stop their bickering. I then grab a cotton swab thing on a stick and i proceed to clean all of the germs off of my gums so that the aliens can't track me. I then apply the secret balm of understanding to my underarms so that no one can detect me as someone different. I put some glue into my hands and scream and throw it against the wall. Every morning is the same. Every morning is different. Every morning I grab a knife. And just don't know where to stick it.

Villains or Vigilantes: Chapter Four

Nicholas and Bidel spent several days breaking fingers and noses with blood stained fists. It was hard to not to use their weapons when the filth of society was so clearly lying to them about what they knew. So far they had discovered nothing about the girl's death. Nicholas noticed that Bidel had an intensity about him that had a violent tendency that couldn't be rivaled by any other. At the moment Bidel was torturing a random man that had bumped into Bidel on the street and not apologized. The cracking of the man's ring finger almost echoed throughout the alleyway that they were now in. "I've got nine other piggies to kill if i don't hear a sincere apology" Bidel growled in the man's face. The man screamed, "I'm sorry!" through tears and blood that were dripping down his face. "That sounded a bit fake to me, how did it sound to you Nicholas?" Before Nicholas could reply another crack of a finger pierced the night air. The man's screams of agony were horrific to Nicholas but it seemed as if Bidel enjoyed it. With every scream that the man let out Bidel looked happier and happier in a sadistic way. The man screamed another apology at the top of his lungs and Bidel took out his axe and chopped off the man's hand. "That was sincere, but it took so long. Now leave before i really get crazy." The man stumbled of holding his stump and crying and before he could get out of the alleyway he fell and passed out. Bidel walked over and dragged the man back to where they'd been standing. He got a good grip on the axe and then put all of his force behind the swing and decapitated the man. Nicholas stood in shock. Bidel wiped the blood off of the axe on the man's shirt and said, "You know Nicholas, you shouldn't look so shocked. Men die everyday." "Yes they do, but it's not right in front of you! What is your deal?" "When i was a young lad, i got fucked over by a lot of people. This is my own personal revenge against the world. See, the way I see it is that you either kill or be killed" "I don't think that applies to this situation" "It applies to life Nicholas, the world is full of killers. I'm just one step ahead of them. I stop them before they even get a chance to have a thought about killing. Nah, that's all bullshit my friend, I'm just a sonofabitch bastard who likes violence. Now, let's go have a steak dinner shall we?"

Forks and Spoons: Preview.

"You're either a fork, or a spoon" Jay said to Anthony with his mouth full of donut holes. "I mean, when i tomes down to it, forks like to fuck and spoons like to spoon".





Romantic Comedy.


Anticipate it. Cherish it. Read it.

Villains or Vigilantes: Chapter Three

Nicholas rubbed his eyes. Had he really seen what he thought he'd seen? Maybe this was simply a hallucination, a side effect of being alone for so long. He leaned against the grimy, dirty wall and slid down to sit on the ground. Just as he was getting comfortable he heard a whistling getting closer to him. He slowly stood to his feet and listened intently. As the whistling got closer he identified it as....I don't wanna miss a thing by Aerosmith? He swung his arm and the chain shot out like a whip at the unidentified figure. It didn't hit its mark and instead hit something else metal and sparks flew out. Nicholas heard the darkest laughter he'd ever heard in his life. "Hold your horses there...i don't know what you'd rather be called? Indiana Jones or The Man in the iron chains?" the man said in an irish accent."Who are you" Nicholas asked. "Names Bidel, some little girl appeared in my fuckin cell two days ago, says to come to Hollywood and come to this alleyway to find someone to help me to find out who killed her. I tell her that i'm in a fuckin prison cell and next thing i know all the cell doors open and i'm the only one to get away. Everyone else gets shot. I figure, hey maybe this girl is a guardian angel...or the opposite." Bidel walks into the light. Nicholas sees that he is wearing pretty much a full tuxedo except without the jacket. And in addition, is holding an axe in each hand. Bidel walks up to Nicholas revealing the most murderous eyes that Nicholas has ever seen. Even though they were brown, they had a reddish tint to them as if demonic and it was plain to see all the bloodshed behind those eyes. Bidel moved real close and said, "Now, since this girl busted me out; I kind of owe her a favor don't i? And if you're supposed to help me, then i'm not really going to give you a choice in the matter" Bidel smiled with his ravenous teeth. "Now what choice will it be?" Nicholas looked down at his dirty hands and then looked up and said, "In a world of war and ever-rising bloodshed, what choice do i have but to fuck some shit up?"

Villains or Vigilante's: Chapter Two.

Nicholas ran and ran until his feet were sore and bloody. He stopped and pulled in his chains and wrapped them around his arm so that they went from his wrists to his shoulder in a coiling pattern. He leaned against a wall and sank down to the ground. Why had he had that strange feeling when the cop had tried to take his chains off? Shouldn't he have felt relief instead of anger when faced with the prospect of freedom from these bonds? That was a question he would need to figure out the answer to. Just then a little girl appeared from nowhere. "Hi! Do you want to play with me?" "Go away, little girl" "That was a rhetorical question you know." "What's a little girl like you doing using big words like that?" "I need you to do something for me." "Yeah? What's that?" "I want you to catch the people who killed me" And then she disappeared.

Alright so

I changed the character in Villains or Vigilante's name from Edward to Nicholas. I wasn't feeling the name Edward and that name already has too much PR from fuckin twilight. So yeah.

11 Years: Chapter Seven.

Chapter Seven: He's in Heaven.

The Delivery Man fucked Madison until he couldn't feel his dick, and then he fucked her some more. She was a loud one too, people could probably hear her from four houses down. She just kept screaming obscenities at the top of her lungs for the world to hear. Her breathing was in tempo with The Delivery Man's quickening heart as their actions became harder and faster. In that one moment (Several times) they were together as one and would not be separated. Finally day broke and they both layed on their backs. Simultaneously they both whispered, "Fuuuuuuck." They looked at each other and laughed. "I think i love you", The Delivery Man said. Madison looked back at him and said, "That's just your cock talking. Say that to me later and we'll see." This made him have even stronger feelings for her. She grabbed his organ and whispered in his ear, "Now fuck me again, stud." And he did. A shitload of times. Like, a lot. It should be a record or something. Fuuuuuuck.